Firm Traditions

We learn from MLB.com that:

"Rally Monday is now a firm tradition that only select MLB markets can enjoy each year…"

For example, MLB’s most tradition rich franchise – the Yankees – so revere Rally Monday that they’ve disassociated themselves from it entirely. Couldn’t be bothered with yet one more untraditional, contrived imposition just prior to the playoffs. 

By contrast, eager Diamondbacks PR flunkies will corner passers by at some Tempe mall I’ve never heard of, to whoop and holler and hand out logo dishrags.  In house hosts Vanessa and Mike are scheduled to put on a grate show, flanked by firm breasted RallyBacks making the scene.

Firm tradition, indeed.

Playing hooky for a playoff game is one thing. Navigating rush hour crosstown traffic for a third rate pep rally?  No thanks. Not unless this svelte rally monkey’s phone number is on my dishrag.

We’re playing the Cubs and that’s exciting enough on its face. Lou Piniella. Zambrano. Alfonso and Aramis. Polish sausage. Derrick Lee. There’s more than enough fire and spice and heavy lumber to go around, without handing out hot pregame woodies. If the Cubs ever did conceive of a Chicagoland rally monkey, however, we imagine it might look something like their fans: doughy and undiscerning.

(photo courtesy of  sockmonkeyfun.com and dbacks.com)